Understanding Our Roles
1 Peter 3:5 (NLT)
“This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They put their trust in God and accepted the authority of their husbands.” – 1 Peter 3:5 (NLT)
God intended that there should be mutual love and respect in the family at all levels. The Merriam-Webster online dictionary aptly defines a family as “the basic unit in society traditionally consisting of two parents raising their children.” In Christendom, this means husband and wife (parents) and their children. The absence of a clear understanding of the roles of each member in the family leads to the development of dysfunctional families where regular conflict in the home, neglect, abuse, and general misbehaviour become the norm.
God’s blueprint for the family offers clear directions on what the norms should be and is clearly outlined in the book of Ephesians. Beginning with husbands and wives, in Ephesians 5:22-29, both parties are admonished to love each other: the wife is to submit to the authority of her husband in his role as head of the family, and the husband is to exercise his leadership of his wife and family in a loving way.
This particular portion of Scripture has been the subject of much debate and is amongst the most misused and misinterpreted. Generally, husbands emphasise the aspect of wives being submissive, while wives, on the other hand, take offense to the notion of ‘submitting’ to a man, even if it’s her husband. But what is really meant? Should a husband see this as an opportunity to take advantage of or abuse his wife? Should a wife refuse to submit to her husband? A wife submitting to her husband is not an opportunity for her to be taken advantage of or abused in any way. Also, wives are reminded that submitting to their husbands is seen as obedience to God.
The Scripture in its entirety states, “Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22 – KJV). A wife who submits to her husband is, in essence, obedient to Christ as she loves, respects, and supports her husband. A Husband is to provide for his wife and family’s spiritual and physiological needs in a loving way, as Christ would for His church (Ephesians 5:25-30). Ephesians 5:33 (KJV) further states, “… let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband’.
The responsibility lies with both parties; both are required to love each other and understand their God-given roles so that they may live in peace and be good examples of Christian life and conduct.
Read: 1 Timothy 5:8; Titus 2:4-5
Bible Reading Guide: Psalm 37:1-9; Luke 4:38-44; Luke 5:1-16; Numbers 15; Numbers 16:1-35
